Keeping Up With The Rest Of Them

Allison Nazarian Life Lessons, Real Life

Sometimes I like to see what other people are saying, writing, doing, putting out there.

And sometimes I don’t.

Sometimes I feel really happy and excited for people who do the thing they wanted to do for so long. They announce their book launch or their new client or the dream job they landed. Could not have happened to a more deserving person, I’ll think.

And then….sometimes I don’t feel really happy and excited for anyone else. Sometimes I judge. And wonder “Why them?” I am certain their lives and their jobs and their kids are not as perfect as they proclaim them to be. I compare. And sneer. And have ugly thoughts. And while I know the ugly thoughts are really more about me than they are about them, I still have them. Then I don’t like myself for having them.

Sometimes I have to take myself off the Facebooks and twitters of the world and focus on what I need to do. Watching what “they” are doing is a distraction and a way to avoid my real work. It is a form of resistance; it is neither research nor analysis. It is likely not moving me forward in a positive way. It allows my Ego and my Mean Voice to remind me why I am at “Point B” and someone else is at “Point Y.”

When I back off and regain some perspective (and become less hormonal), I remember their Y and my B are not even on the same road to begin with. That their ability to do great work is a wonderful thing. That the world needs me as much as it needs that other person. That no one else out there is living my life or doing my work or fulfilling my purpose. That I, and only I, can do those things.

I remind myself that my time will come, and also that my time is already here. That I am no different than you in that regard.I remind myself that their successes are to be celebrated as my own.That they key to me doing what I dream of doing and the key to you doing what you dream of doing is found one place. And that place is not in the tweets and announcements and accomplishments of anyone else. That I already know where that place is and that I need to cultivate it every single day. 

The energy we need to do everything we want to do is already there to use however we choose to use it. I say, spend it wisely. (Or, most days I say that. Some days I have less-nice thoughts.) Negative feelings and emotions drain away the “juice” we have to do and create and develop those amazing things that we want to do and create and develop.

Even if we use it poorly, we have still used it up nonetheless.

When I am able to take that proverbial step back, I am able to see the truth: Comparing is a dream killer. A narrow and lack-minded view is an everything killer. Trying to keep up with everything and everyone else is an everything killer.

Ultimately, someone else’s shine does not detract from my shine.

So, for today, I say Way to Go! Congrats! I salute you! You rock! I am as happy for you and all of your wonderful ways of being as I am for myself.

And, yes, I hope that for tomorrow as well.

One day at a time.

 

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